#take the whole thing instesd i mean what

[mushed-kid]

im not a waiter but ill take ur tip

LMAOOOLO HIT ME UP

[cutebabygurl]

I vaguely remeber that time where a 4hr lecture turns into a 30min lecture cause my professor is doing this silent technique where they just sit there at the front of the desk waiting for the whole class to shut tf up and notice that the teacher aint teaching, and as dumb, energetic, very easily distracted 16 yr olds we didnt notice this dumbass technique, and we just thought he was just chilling and just waiting to pass the time, we dont know what the resson is, but we do know that we aint sparing him a glance or a tiny bit of acknowledgedment to make him teach, we like this chaos, we like to talk our asses off and do work with other subjects, we like doing our own thing, and i guess this fucker had enough and let out a "sssshhhhhhhhhhhh" all heads turn at him and he just glares at us, like trowing daggers kind of glare, but our faces are much worse; i dont know what kind of womb this guy is is born with cause his mama gave him steels of balls to have the ability to handle 50+ students staring nuclear horoshima bombs at him, looking at him with such contempt and hatred, its like disturbing peace on a flag ceremony, or shooting a gun at a kids birthday party or dressing up as a clown to a club, what this teacher did is so out of the norm that it threw us off our rhythm, and we just look at him with confusion, like HE'S THE CRAZY ONE! Like mind you this fucker came in LATE he came in at 2:40 instesd of 1pm and this fucker had the balls to boss us around telling us to shut up, bitch! You're the one who broke the rule first, after 2 and a half hrs without authority and on top of being late, you think we gatta take you seriously??? FUCK NO! we are here ON TIME! YOU THE ONE WHOS LATE! WE HAVE THE HIGHER GROUND! WE ARE THE SUPERIOR ONE! And after this intense showdown, a silent war had settled into the classroom, no dared to break eye contact, cause breaking it means losing this battle, we're stubborn little fucks who craves authority and we aint backing down to give it up to someone who lost it by Mr. late fuckingson over here, NO! We are winning this war! So we glared with determination on our eyes and i feel this union between my classmates and I, it a silent protest to authority and i love it! But as the absolute chad that my professor is, he got up, opened a book about physics and says "so in our last topic in chapter 50" he tirned around and draw a demonstration about a car and velocity and frequency and weight and shit, and OH MY GOD! The war is over, our silent protest did not work, turns out having 40+ experience of teaching could really turn your balls into steel, and turns out we didnt have his authority he was just lending it to us, he just let us feel it for a little while, the taste of freedom is fleeing and we're back to this boring ass lecture, i guess we're the one who disrupted the peace of the classroom, i guess we're the clowns on the club, the teacher has won and this once energetic classroom has now fallen into silence...losing the war and going back to routine.

[ur-bi-gf]

My dreams

My dreams have been all over the place.

Three nights in a row, I dreamt about dating my ex and asking to have him back. Qhen he pissed me off the other night, I had an interesting dream, that i wont get into to. Laat night, i dreamy about apologizing to him for making him feel like he wanted to die.

There was something he said to me not to long ago, or smth he said in general. Like i never cared about it?

I literally hate it when he says that, cause like i did care about him, he was literally my world and i did love him with all my heart, until he started ignoring me and not telling me why. I mean, hell, i gave him my first kiss! That's really hella important to me. Dont you hate it when the people you cared about the most say you never cared about them? Thats one of the worse things to me, because its like, hellooo! I loved you so much, i cared about you for so long, I stayed here when you had an anxoety attack, I was here when you cried, I was always trying to be there for you. Some guys just dont get it.

Like i know i became a bitch to him, but thats because he shattered my heart when i poured it out to him and his reaction was idk, it just broke me, and i snapped. I dont think i ever did that to a person but the thing is...

What I wrote meant so much to me, all my feelings were there, all i felt for him, how i fucked up, how i loved him, how I'll always have some feelings for him no matter what because its hard to not have feelings for someone you were with for seven months no matter what happens. And then his reaction was "idk".

I have no idea why that made me snap, maybe because i poured my heart out to this dude and he gave me three letters back? I mean, that kinda was an asshole move...

Do you ever love someone with all your heart and soul then they accuse you of you never loving them? Because if that has happened to you, then same.

And he said i was never there for him i was there for me, NO, because when i was in denial after the breakup, i wouldve been fine not talking to him but i stayed because i wanted to make sure he was okay. I always wanted to make sure hes okay, because hes a good person and I loved him.

Exs are so weird right? I mean the guy exs are weird too sometimes. Or exs that accuse you of never caring or never loving them? Like wow, okay. It just ruffles my feathers a bit like big oof-

You know, he said dating me was a living hell, but last night i talked to a friend and they said he probably didnt mean that, and that he was just mad at me too in the moment.

I know dating me wasnt a living hell, so i know he didnt mean that. And i know he did love dating me until we broke up.

Because he's like, out of all the relationships I've had, that was probably the best one, i dont know if he'd say the same though.

You know, when i broke up with him, i never meant to hurt him, but in a breakup someone is always bound to get hurt.

I didnt wanna talk to him about what was going on in my head, and thats why everything ended. But i know to be more communication savvy in my next relationship, so I'm glad for that.

Im like 85% over him, and looking back at everything that has happened, i realized, this breakup was woahhhh. I mean i was an asshole after but he was a bit more of an asshole, ill take like 40% of being an asshole and he was the other 60-

Im joking haha, but its a breakup? What can you do? Not all break ups are gonna be clean, right? This whole experience was fun, and i learned how mean i could be to a person which was... WOW i fucking snapped and it was nice to be mean for one instesd of nice and holding it in, its just i was rude to the wrong person.

But he was mean back so, even now?

Sometimes i look at his tumblr posts *cough*EMOTIONAL SELF HARM*cough* yes i know the signs.

And i see things like "I know we broke up/you'll find someone else to love but fuck i think youre mine" which he said about me.

I wonder what happened to that.

But like i said in one of my earlier posts, he lost feelings because i made him feel like an asshole, but...

If you really love someone... I really dont think he'd get over me that quickly despite what happened.

So there's something I dont know, either he never really loved me or hes not completely over me.

I realized what animal I'm like. Im like a dog.

Im an energetic moody motherfucker sometimes, so like a kinda moody dog, but the right affection and love will make me feel amazing! Also the random bursts of energy i get sometimes are kinda like a dog haha. But mostly... Because im loyal. Thats how i am, im loyal, and getting rid of me, is like getting rid of a dog.

The dog always wonders what it did wrong, why it wasnt good enough, how is it's owner/person doing, because it still cares and its loyal to what it has loved.

I figured out my animal yay!

I think thats all for this morning haha.

I had a lot to say, you know. I think imma write about my ex often because there is soooooo much i had to say in the past i never got to say and this is my chance! So yeah!

Have a good day/night everyone!